The Bachelorette versus Iowa

As we all know, Chris went home on the Bachelorette.

Chris, our beloved Iowa boy with a heart of gold.

Obviously, it shows Andi wasn't good enough for our precious boy.

That's fine...kkkk byeeeee, Andi.

Of course, Chris is the campaign header for the bachelor.

I don't really agree with that because I think he's too innocent, and a girl might like him for a while, but the girls on the Bachelor aren't always the classiest... I'm really picky about who deserves this handsome creature. 

One thing that Chris' elimination really taught me (from Twitter) is that this country has no idea what Iowa is like at all. From the way we dress to live to anything, people are clueless. 

Here are some of the misconceptions the country is potentially thinking right now:

1. They think the typical female wears plaid and cowboy boots.

This is not true, not true at all. And the cowboy boots I can think of girls wearing are strictly reserved for scooping poo, square toed, and not the cute little things people think of. I secretly hate when girls wear cowboy boots to places like the fair, rodeos, country concerts...etc. I get it, it's "cute", but it's just strange to me. Sidetrack, but no. We wear regular clothes, and reserve our flannels for our waists or fall days.

What we are not:

If any of my friends starting dressing like this, I'd be honestly concerned. 

2. Iowa is an island in the Arctic Ocean.

Throughout the whole show, the big question was, "Yeah, but can you live in Iowa?" Andi is/was (was fired/quit her job) a lawyer, and yes, people in Iowa still do get divorced, murdered, etc. We need lawyers sometimes around here. Also, just people acted flabbergasted. "In Iowa?" 

No, she couldn't do that. 

Fun fact: Iowa is actually one of the 48 continental states. Very close to cities such as Chicago, Milwaukee, Minneapolis, and the very home to Des Moines. One of the best growing cities in the country. 

3. We are all farmers like Chris.

Not everyone in Iowa is a farmer/grew up on a farm. None of my friends grew up on a farm. So, yeah I don't know what else to say about that one. We are more knowledgeable about the agriculture industry, but that's not a bad thing. All the benefits of living on a farm without having to scoop poop and sell poor animals to be slaughtered. 

4. We're not smart.

People made it sound like Iowans are a little dumb, pitiful. Iowa is actually an extremely intelligent state. Iowa has the highest literacy rate in the country. The Iowa Test of Basic Skills is obviously developed in Iowa. We're pretty intelligent. We're pretty street smart too, because we're independent and stuff. 

5. There is nothing to do in Iowa.

I'll admit, Iowa isn't the state with the most attractions. But that doesn't mean we don't have things to do. We still have ways to be entertained, and we don't run through corn fields all day. Also, we can party in barns with real life pigs. Iowa teaches you to be creative and enjoy the little things. We don't need crazy places every day to be happy. 

6. Iowa is just a state.

Iowa is a way of life. I feel so much pride to be from Iowa. It's one of the greatest, friendliest states out there. Iowans spread joy far and wide in this country. It's an absolutely beautiful state in it's own right: the simplistic backbone of our country. Without Iowa, how would the world eat? Iowa does so much for this country, and we're just a really undermined state. We probably all know each other somehow. My mom knows a lady whose grandma lived next to Chris' great grandma. Pretty wild. If people came to Iowa, how could you not love it? So charming and sweet, just like the people who live in it. 

(Etsy Shop)
https://www.etsy.com/listing/115417370/iowa-state-digital-illustration-with-des

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Short post, but I was honestly shocked to see what people thought of Iowa! People are so ignorant to what they don't know. 

Instagram: lanlanbaby

Twitter: @alannajean2013

The 5 Levels of B!tćhÿ Resting Face

Lately, I feel like the b!tchy resting face is all the rage on the internet. 

I guess I didn't even realize it was a thing...I think I'm probably a 3...people always ask me "what's wrong?"

But I don't think it's just one face...not every b face is the same. 

I think there are levels of intensity.

And you might be the nicest person but have the meanest face...it's just the way God made ya.

But it can get annoying always being asked what's wrong..cause nothing is wrong.

Level 1: Miss Happy Pants

The only reason you made this list is because you have a face.

You might look upset if someone told you Christmas isn't the most wonderful time or April 25th isn't the perfect date. 

You're like Cheryl...do you see her mean mugging?

Oh heck no. 

You're happy all the time. Or at least look like it.

One time I saw this girl on campus, and she was just walking alone.

I don't know if she was just so extremely happy or was forcibly making herself smile.

Either way, an ear to ear grin.

So even when she's resting, there wasn't no b word face going on.

Level 2: Blank Stare

The lights are on but it's questionable if anyone is home.

This can be intimidating because people can't really tell what you're thinking?

Happy? Sad? Mad? Excited?

You also might have the same expression for any of those feelings.

Like:

You're just hard to read. 

But maybe that's a good thing.

People also might mistake you for an airhead, but we know that's not true.

Level 3: Da Sad Face

I think this is where I fit in.

I started talking to this kid after he asked me what was wrong and that I didn't need to be sad on the bus. 

No, nothing is wrong. I guess I just have a sad face. 

I think I have a very youthful face/features, so maybe that has to do with it?

I don't know. I think the best response is: 

"My dog Nike just died. He wasn't just a dog!"

Level 4: The Usual Resting B Face

This is the face that has made worldwide headlines.

This is the face that has been coined the resting bitchy face.

This is the "mean mug."

You look mad...I think this level actually has different severities.

Some people's look "stuck up", some look "mad", "disgusted" and some just look scary mean.

I can think of one girl who honestly scares me by her resting face...she's nice, but she's intimidating.

I think of this as disgusted:

But she could be tickled pink.

People also might think you look like an ice queen. But that's bad on their part, not yours.

What's worse...preconceived notions or a face?

Level 5: You're just a...

you know...similar to one, this number exists simply because you have a face.

You have a b face, because you are a b.

Can't hide what you know.

You need to downgrade to a level 4...then it's just your face and not your personality.

There still is hope for you...someday maybe you won't be one and just have a face like one.

Maybe you need to join lacrosse...it worked for Regina George.

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Now assess the options and place yourself.

If you're a 1: Good for you. Just thinking about you makes me want to eat cotton candy and dream of lollipops and gumdrops.

If you're a 2: Maybe just spice up your face a little bit. It'll really throw people for a loop.

If you're a 3: I feel your pain. Either try to make your face more happy? or really take it to the next level, and whenever anyone asks you, burst into tears. I bet they won't ever ask again.

If you're a 4: Feel proud you fit the typical mold of the resting bitch face. Wave your flag high.

If you're a 5: Change your sass, giiiirl.

As long as you're not a 5, don't ever feel the need to explain your face.

You don't have to explain why the sky is blue, why you like pizza, so you shouldn't have to apologize for your God given face.

So....

An Unsuccessful Society: Selfishness and Insecurity

In this day and age, supporting one another and helping "friends" succeed should be the easiest thing in the world.

We update each other 24/7 about what we do, what we're trying to accomplish.

All we really have to do is push the like button, the share button, or send a simple message saying "I think what you're doing is great," or "I hope that goes well for you."

But no, as a society, we don't want that for other people.

We could not be bothered to do any of the above. 

But why?

Sure, we're a lazy society, but how much energy does it take to push a thumbs up?

No, it doesn't have to do with laziness, it has to do with self-confidence issues.

What would it hurt to support someone else if we're confident with ourselves?

Trick question, because it wouldn't. 

We should support whatever people are trying to do, because society as a whole would be better off if everyone was more successful...and happy.

People will be happy if they see people support what they do.

But more times, we're questioning our "friends", because really, it seems they don't want us to succeed.

A major thing I think folks these days should look for in confidants is:

support.

Because these days, it's hard to find.

Your friends should help you, promote you, want the best for you.

And I don't think most people do. 

I have very few friends who I think really support me.

Don't mock what I do, tell me you think it's cool.

Even if you don't, because maybe it isn't cool to you. But I'm your friend, and I do think it's cool.

I saw this photo on the Humans of New York Facebook page.

"I'm sure I'd be less jealous if I was more confident."

I think this statement really captures the fault in our society.

I can't support you, because I'm not confident enough to support myself.

I think this holds true for half of the people in the world.

I think the other half is pure selfishness. 

"I can't support you, and potentially fuel part of your success, because that would leave less attention and success for myself."

Which is so, so sad.

Someone once said to about me (I told myself I wouldn't write about this, but I've gotsta),

"Why don't you blog about it?"

So incredibly rude and just shows what I'm talking about.

It shows a dig at something I do that not everyone does, that doesn't affect you at all.

It's meant to mock something I enjoy doing, and that people have told me as helped them.

I'm sorry I'm doing something that isn't the usual. But I enjoy it.

So, leave me alone.

People are poisonous, I'll use my blog as an example, just because it's something I know.

People will come up to me, "I read your blog."

I appreciate you telling me that, and for reading it, but why not like, share, whatever it?

Almost no one likes my blog posts, but then tells me they liked it.

And sometimes I just feel defeated, I supposedly have all these "friends", yet no one seems to care what I'm doing.

My "friends" don't like my pictures on Instagram, even if I like all of theirs.

You don't have to support me, but don't expect me to support you or even keep your "friendship."

And it's not just my blog.

It's someone's anything.

Pursuing a modeling, singing, athletic career.

These things are huge odds, but we should support people no matter what, because that's what good people do.

Starting a business, changing your personal style, becoming who you're meant to be.

Plain and simple: good people spread "good vibes" (sorry, that is so not my saying, I do see it places and it fits real well), support, and love. 

We have to move on from our own insecurity and selfishness, and support our acquaintance, neighbors, and especially friends. 

Cause that's what friends are for, right?

This post isn't supposed to just say "You're doing something wrong."
You are, but I am too. I just really encourage everyone to promote everyone's success and livelihood. 
Like your friend's business, share your friend's event, etc. It's that easy.
Technology should have made promotion easier, not more snobby.
Support those you care about, or just say hey, I think what you're doing is really neat, even if it's a complete stranger!

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Thanks guys! It's just something I think the world is not really addressing.
People are selfish, the actions we have to take are not hard.
Another thing I saw today that I thought was really cool was this little link right here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjJQBjWYDTs
From Always, shames using "like a girl" as an insult.
#Likeagirl...the least we can do is promote and not demote someone's basic biological sex.

Thank you for reading, I hope ya'll enjoyed!
Like, share, message me, whatever.
Twitter: @alannajean2013
Instagram: lanlanbaby

Also, this was supposed to be my Youtube Channel cover, but Youtube is winning in the smart struggle right now. Thank you for the (very) few who support me in what I do. You're my heart.

-Alanna 

Life Lessons from Lan.

My gawd...has it really been three weeks since the last time I wrote a blog post here.

Yikes...been so busy I guess! Online classes, graduations, weddings, babysitting...I thought summer was supposed to be down time, but that's fine.

But anyhoo....

this summer I think has really been a summer of personal growth for me.

For many reasons.

First off, I'm starting to see where my life is heading. 

High school is great, but that's not who you are. The latest thing at my ex high school is a page telling people's "hook ups." I'm so glad I am past that part in my life...so glad. To the people running that page, encouraging that page, where is your life heading? The drama and no class express. Because even if you aren't the one participating, just following the account gives them ammunition. Open your eyes, kids. 

In high school, I talked behind people's backs SO MUCH. And now, I just don't know how I did it. I mean, I'm a girl, I gossip here and there, but I really have learned that redirecting the conversation is much better. Don't have any words pinned to you that you don't want pinned there. If your life was a Pinterest board, you would want cuddles and happiness pinned there, not hate. 

College teaches you some things in life just aren't acceptable. Saying "that's so gay"...yeah, you can't do that. Or "retarded." Or anything remotely offensive. And honestly, life is so much better without it. Those words aren't needed, required, feel good words, so why use them?

I realize you have to live your life with a purpose. If you are using those words, talking about this person, promoting a harassing account, your purpose must be to hurt as many people in life as possible. To throw as much poison into the atmosphere as possible. You can't contradict yourself. "I really believe in Jesus Christ and all he has done for me." Then show that...that's not doing the things above. It's not getting drunk every weekend. It's showing whatever it is your life purpose is. Live for Christ, be kind, whatever. Actions speak louder than words. 

I have realized that life doesn't always have a direct path. I switched my major in my mind every day, but I think I'm at a good place. And if I'm not, guess what I can switch it again. There is no right and wrong when it comes to what you're going to do with your life. Unless it's dealing meth or being a pimp...that's questionable.

One of the HUGE things I have realized this summer is that I don't need no man. I will be the first one to admit I could be clingy, I could be this, I could be that. But it's solely because I felt like I NEEDED those relationships. All I've learned is that most of those relationships are poison. But ever since I was young, I felt like I needed that approval from boys. I don't need their approval because I am giving myself my own stamp of approval.

This kid messaged me after a year, only to ignore me again. Boys make no sense. And I don't need them. I feel comfortable not texting someone 23 out of the 24 hours in a day. When the right person comes around, they'll come around.

I guess, the path of this post is kind of like life. Kind of random, but not right or wrong. I just want to encourage people to really think about their actions, to understand themselves, and not need approval. That isn't too much to ask, right? 

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Thanks for reading, ya'll! Please be sure to like, share, follow, etc etc. 

Twitter: @alannajean2013

Instagram: lanlanbaby

Tumblr: preciouslylan

Ask: ask.fm/alannahill

Email: ahill1325@gmail.com

Love always, Lan. 

What's the Difference Between CA Chrome and Miss #2?

Alanna Hill, 19, Eagle Grove, IOWA!

Oh sorry, I was practicing my Miss USA introduction.

Considering I'm writing this watching Miss USA 2014...wouldn't miss it.

This post was originally inspired by another high stakes event but it can also go with this.

It was originally about my precious California Chrome in the Belmont Stakes...

team California Chrome all the way.

But it's all about moving on in life.

We all know that Chrome didn't get his triple crown.

and we all know only one of these 51 women will be Miss USA.

So trivia question...What's the difference between California Chrome and the girl who gets first runner up in this pageant?

A: California Chrome is going to move on with his life, while Miss #2 is going to spend the rest of her life wondering, "what if?" 

California Chrome don't care that he got fifth in the Belmont Stakes when people bet 4/5 that he would win. Yeah, that horse does not give two fashizzles. 

He did not wake up this morning and kick himself.

He moved on with his life, did his horse stuff, and lived life.

And that's what he's going to do for the rest of his life.

CA Chrome doesn't realize the stakes of races, therefore he doesn't care.

It's just something he does.

The man of the hour.

Humans on the other hand...

we always think about the ifs.

And it's hard to move past.

What if... my senior track season hadn't been such a shiz show. 

What if...I hadn't dated such a douche fly.

What if...I hadn't been called 1st runner up but Miss USA.

Miss #2 will wake up tomorrow and wonder:

Was my makeup good enough?

Did I lose enough weight?

Were my boobs perky enough?

Was my dress the most bomb diggity?

Did I have flyaways?

etc..

We dwell so much on what isn't changeable. It's hard to let go of something you really ponder on. 

But what good does it do?

Just poisons our spirit and present. 

We can't go back, so why is our mind back there?

It sucks of course that whatever that didn't go right didn't go right.

But it ain't changing so let's just move on.

Take a breathe. Say goodbye to it.

We just gotta be like CA Chrome and keep doing our horse things. 

Life is moving too fast to be ripped backwards.

Just live each day like it's the best days, frands. 

My girl, Bunny. "Sassy, Sassy Sassy, So Sassy, Sassy Sassy."

Let's see...this blog post seems kind of short.

Maybe slightly random, but I am distracted.

Miss Iowa made it to the Top 20.

Make sure you share please! 

Love reaching people I don't know. 

Email: ahill1325@gmail.com

Instagram: lanlanbaby

Twitter: @alannajean2013

Tumblr: preciouslylan

Pinterest: livelovelanna

Ask: ask.fm/alannahill

Whew, that's all. Love you all. 

Identicals: Cats and Bad Boys

So this blog post came out of my little noggin.

I don't really know if any other person on this earth would be odd enough to concoct this theory besides myself.

And the name of the game is:

how cats and bad boys are almost the same thing.

The two are very similar and we chase them for the same reasons.

Now...hang with me, folks. It's actually probably the newest scientific discovery. 

It'll be in list format, so if you don't dig that, byeee. 

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1. Both are very mysterious.

Bad boys: mysterious because they don't give you any hint at their thoughts.

Cats:mysterious because... what the heck are they doing ever.

2. Neither really wants to take pictures with you.

Bad boys: don't want to take a picture with you because their other girlfriends would see it.

Cats: just uncooperative jerks.

3. If it's a bad boy or a cat, either way, it ain't listening to you.

Bad boys: "do what they want."

Cats: also do what they want...I've had my cat for 7 years now and she still acts like she doesn't know her name. 

4. No matter how much you shower them with love, it's definitely not going to make them love you.

Bad boys: you can give them all the love and affection you want, but that does not mean he will ever want to marry you.

Cats: cats will only want to give you affection when you're really not feeling it. They have a sensor, they know. When you want to snuggle, they just run, scratch, bite. 

5. They might secretly enjoy the gifts you give them, but they'll never let you know.

Bad boy: a bad boy might be using you, so you should not be showering them with your gift giving abilities. 

Cat: Forget the gift...just give them the packaging.

6. They ignore you.

Bad boys: They will ignore your calls, texts, snapchats, Facebook messages, etc. without the bat of an eye.

Cats: As said earlier, they'll ignore their name. Ignore no. Ignore stop. Ignore ignore ignore. I guess the difference is that cats just do it straight to your face.

 

7. But you are absolutely expected to be there for them whenever they deem it.

Bad boys: Yes, they can do whatever they want. No, you may not. Bad boys have a way of controlling of your mind and actions.

Cats: When you want love, forget about it. When they want food, they won't let you forget about it.

8. You can't help but wanting them to love you.

Bad boys: It's the thrill of the chase. I don't know why as humans we do that to ourselves. We want what we can't have. Because a bad boy does not want what we want. But there's always the "what if." Yeah, that's not ever going to happen.

Cats: Again, the thrill of the chase. Maybe just maybe someday they'll do exactly what you want. But once again, not going to happen.

(this gif has absolutely nothing to do with anything...i just die every time I watch it.)

9. They might do one cute thing every six months, but that one cute thing makes everything worth it, right?

Bad boys: they brought you flowers they found in the garbage behind their drug house...that's so cute.

Cats: so stupid, they don't realize they did anything. And what they did probably wasn't all that cute, but of course it was!

10. They'll miss you when you're gone.

Bad boys: when they're 80 and alone, they'll realize you were the bomb diggity. "Baby, I was wrong."

Cats: even if they don't show it, cats miss you a ton when you leave them. Whether a day or months, they love you.

In the end, which is superior, a cat or a bad boy?

The cat for sure. Bad boys are just troubled souls afraid to grow up, afraid to commit. 

Cats are just innocent little critters. Also fuzzy and soft. 

So I mean...boys just started off with the shorter stick, but didn't make up for it.

Remember: 

Sorry, this was so heavily cat picture based. But I mean...I love the felines.

Thank you so much for reading!

Remember to send me ideas, thoughts, opinions, etc! An open book.

Twitter: @alannajean2013

Instagram: lanlanbaby

Ask: ask.fm/alannahill

Facebook: Alanna Jean Hill

The Seven Skinnies on Being Skinny.

Skinny girl probs...

I'm not saying I'm super skinny..i know I'm not like the tiniest person alive.

I think I'm at a healthy weight, maybe go down like 5 pounds. 

But when you are on the skinnier side, it's not all the perks people act like it is.

So, I have decided to make this list (I love da lists.) about the downfalls of being thin.

This post was inspired by:

me and my life and my thoughts.

1. "Oh my gosh, shut up."

-the above face is the look people give skinny people when they say anything about body issues, and then likewise, the face skinny people give them when they say something about them saying something.

when you're skinny (girl), you actually become a different creature. One who is not allowed to think your thighs are too chunky, your tummy looks flabby, etc. Skinny girls are girls too, and will have body image issues just like you. Do not think the comment someone says has anything to do with you, it has to do with their own thoughts about themselves.  "Perfection is a disease of the nation"...duh.

2. "Oh my gosh, you're so skinny!"

the above statement might be better for someone who just lost a lost of weight. 300 to 150. when you say it to a skinny person, it seems like you're suggesting the above image. "So" skinny is more like an insult. If someone is skinny, it really doesn't need to be addressed. Would you go up to a heavy person and so, "You're so big!" Or a person with brunette hair, "Oh my goodness, you're hair is so brown!"

I don't know why our society feels the need to comment on everything about everyone's appearance.

3. "The No Tittay Commitay"

most skinny girls are "lacking" something deemed perfection by society. it's rare for you to be naturally skinny and have big bazoongas or a big ol' booty. Some people do...and those people are just not fair. 

4. "You aren't a 'real woman'."

I'm pretty sure anatomically a "real woman" has female genitalia. I think that should basically sum up that term...and even there..the lines are blurred. I want the folks who are skinny shaming girls to explain to me what it constitutes to be a "real woman." People say that being skinny means you can't bear children...huh. I don't think bearing children is a part of being a real woman: lots of women can't get pregnant. And it's just false besides that.

It is not wrong to be skinny. 

5. "Skinny people don't have cellulite..."

Bethany girl..i'm with you. People just think heavy people get cellulite. Cellulite is not due to weight...it has to do with fat cells and the skin layers. Doing the calculations, most every human is a candidate. Unless you are the Ghost of John (Have you seen the ghost of John...never mind.) So when someone says they're trying to get rid of their cellulite and they skinny, you be quiet, yo. 

6. "You really need to eat a cheeseburger or something. Can we get this girl a burger?"

Society has also made skinny girls to just take this...even though it's extremely offensive. When you say something like that, you are insinuating the person has anorexia. So the analogy just went skinny= anorexic. But skinny people are just supposed to smile and giggle and take it. K Let's not anymore. I would never tell someone that should lay off the burgers. So why would I tell someone they should lay on the burgers? Let's think, ya'll. If you rude, you rude.

7. "You wouldn't understand."

(I don't know...all I could come up with.)

Apparently being skinny means you can't be apart of some club. the club that other people make that to them is "everyone else." Skinny people just don't understand other people's body issues, because they don't have brains right? Body issues have less to do with your body, and more with your mind. So everyone with a brain (except boys...sorry, I don't know if you guys do get girls' issues) can understand appearance problems. 

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So, my brain has kind of hit a road block I suppose...late at night. 

8 is late for some of us old folks.

I guess if you have any questions, contact me. 

Need moral support, a joke, I dunno. I'll find something.

Contact info:

Twitter: @alannajean2013

Instagram: lanlanbaby

Ask: ask.fm/alannahill

Email: ahill1325@gmail.com

if you haven't been able to tell...i love cats.