Life Lessons from Lan.

My gawd...has it really been three weeks since the last time I wrote a blog post here.

Yikes...been so busy I guess! Online classes, graduations, weddings, babysitting...I thought summer was supposed to be down time, but that's fine.

But anyhoo....

this summer I think has really been a summer of personal growth for me.

For many reasons.

First off, I'm starting to see where my life is heading. 

High school is great, but that's not who you are. The latest thing at my ex high school is a page telling people's "hook ups." I'm so glad I am past that part in my life...so glad. To the people running that page, encouraging that page, where is your life heading? The drama and no class express. Because even if you aren't the one participating, just following the account gives them ammunition. Open your eyes, kids. 

In high school, I talked behind people's backs SO MUCH. And now, I just don't know how I did it. I mean, I'm a girl, I gossip here and there, but I really have learned that redirecting the conversation is much better. Don't have any words pinned to you that you don't want pinned there. If your life was a Pinterest board, you would want cuddles and happiness pinned there, not hate. 

College teaches you some things in life just aren't acceptable. Saying "that's so gay"...yeah, you can't do that. Or "retarded." Or anything remotely offensive. And honestly, life is so much better without it. Those words aren't needed, required, feel good words, so why use them?

I realize you have to live your life with a purpose. If you are using those words, talking about this person, promoting a harassing account, your purpose must be to hurt as many people in life as possible. To throw as much poison into the atmosphere as possible. You can't contradict yourself. "I really believe in Jesus Christ and all he has done for me." Then show that...that's not doing the things above. It's not getting drunk every weekend. It's showing whatever it is your life purpose is. Live for Christ, be kind, whatever. Actions speak louder than words. 

I have realized that life doesn't always have a direct path. I switched my major in my mind every day, but I think I'm at a good place. And if I'm not, guess what I can switch it again. There is no right and wrong when it comes to what you're going to do with your life. Unless it's dealing meth or being a pimp...that's questionable.

One of the HUGE things I have realized this summer is that I don't need no man. I will be the first one to admit I could be clingy, I could be this, I could be that. But it's solely because I felt like I NEEDED those relationships. All I've learned is that most of those relationships are poison. But ever since I was young, I felt like I needed that approval from boys. I don't need their approval because I am giving myself my own stamp of approval.

This kid messaged me after a year, only to ignore me again. Boys make no sense. And I don't need them. I feel comfortable not texting someone 23 out of the 24 hours in a day. When the right person comes around, they'll come around.

I guess, the path of this post is kind of like life. Kind of random, but not right or wrong. I just want to encourage people to really think about their actions, to understand themselves, and not need approval. That isn't too much to ask, right? 

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Thanks for reading, ya'll! Please be sure to like, share, follow, etc etc. 

Twitter: @alannajean2013

Instagram: lanlanbaby

Tumblr: preciouslylan

Ask: ask.fm/alannahill

Email: ahill1325@gmail.com

Love always, Lan. 

Identicals: Cats and Bad Boys

So this blog post came out of my little noggin.

I don't really know if any other person on this earth would be odd enough to concoct this theory besides myself.

And the name of the game is:

how cats and bad boys are almost the same thing.

The two are very similar and we chase them for the same reasons.

Now...hang with me, folks. It's actually probably the newest scientific discovery. 

It'll be in list format, so if you don't dig that, byeee. 

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1. Both are very mysterious.

Bad boys: mysterious because they don't give you any hint at their thoughts.

Cats:mysterious because... what the heck are they doing ever.

2. Neither really wants to take pictures with you.

Bad boys: don't want to take a picture with you because their other girlfriends would see it.

Cats: just uncooperative jerks.

3. If it's a bad boy or a cat, either way, it ain't listening to you.

Bad boys: "do what they want."

Cats: also do what they want...I've had my cat for 7 years now and she still acts like she doesn't know her name. 

4. No matter how much you shower them with love, it's definitely not going to make them love you.

Bad boys: you can give them all the love and affection you want, but that does not mean he will ever want to marry you.

Cats: cats will only want to give you affection when you're really not feeling it. They have a sensor, they know. When you want to snuggle, they just run, scratch, bite. 

5. They might secretly enjoy the gifts you give them, but they'll never let you know.

Bad boy: a bad boy might be using you, so you should not be showering them with your gift giving abilities. 

Cat: Forget the gift...just give them the packaging.

6. They ignore you.

Bad boys: They will ignore your calls, texts, snapchats, Facebook messages, etc. without the bat of an eye.

Cats: As said earlier, they'll ignore their name. Ignore no. Ignore stop. Ignore ignore ignore. I guess the difference is that cats just do it straight to your face.

 

7. But you are absolutely expected to be there for them whenever they deem it.

Bad boys: Yes, they can do whatever they want. No, you may not. Bad boys have a way of controlling of your mind and actions.

Cats: When you want love, forget about it. When they want food, they won't let you forget about it.

8. You can't help but wanting them to love you.

Bad boys: It's the thrill of the chase. I don't know why as humans we do that to ourselves. We want what we can't have. Because a bad boy does not want what we want. But there's always the "what if." Yeah, that's not ever going to happen.

Cats: Again, the thrill of the chase. Maybe just maybe someday they'll do exactly what you want. But once again, not going to happen.

(this gif has absolutely nothing to do with anything...i just die every time I watch it.)

9. They might do one cute thing every six months, but that one cute thing makes everything worth it, right?

Bad boys: they brought you flowers they found in the garbage behind their drug house...that's so cute.

Cats: so stupid, they don't realize they did anything. And what they did probably wasn't all that cute, but of course it was!

10. They'll miss you when you're gone.

Bad boys: when they're 80 and alone, they'll realize you were the bomb diggity. "Baby, I was wrong."

Cats: even if they don't show it, cats miss you a ton when you leave them. Whether a day or months, they love you.

In the end, which is superior, a cat or a bad boy?

The cat for sure. Bad boys are just troubled souls afraid to grow up, afraid to commit. 

Cats are just innocent little critters. Also fuzzy and soft. 

So I mean...boys just started off with the shorter stick, but didn't make up for it.

Remember: 

Sorry, this was so heavily cat picture based. But I mean...I love the felines.

Thank you so much for reading!

Remember to send me ideas, thoughts, opinions, etc! An open book.

Twitter: @alannajean2013

Instagram: lanlanbaby

Ask: ask.fm/alannahill

Facebook: Alanna Jean Hill

Advice for Fresh-mincemeat.

Happy weekend! Last weekend of high school basically for my lovelies at EGHS.
So with that...comes college. (Or perhaps you are going into the military, and thank you for your service.)

This post was inspired by:
My lovely little cousin, Alex McPhail.
She goes to school in Cedar Rapids, and will be a fellow Cyclone next year!

So with this post, comes advice for college.
It can be a rough terrain to navigate, especially when it's such a monstrous place like Iowa State.
So I have decided to make this list in a do/don't fashion.
Because some things you should do and some you shouldn't.

So here we goo...
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do. Work hard in your classes.
-sure the parties may be fun for a while, but the reason you are at school is to get an education. Remember that.

don't. use a map...ever.
-some campuses are big, but that does not mean you should whip out your map. Take a day before classes and go exploring with your schedule. Or use Google Maps on your phone, it'll look like you're just texting or something.

do. find friends outside of your dorm.
-having friends on your floor is convenient, but you will not be around those people for that portion of time ever again. branch out and meet different people in different places.

don't. always dress like a slob.
-yeah, it's college, but that does not give you an excuse to always look homeless. Not only will you feel better about yourself if you have actual clothes and makeup on, but the first impression you give people will be better. College is your step before the real world, and you should look appropriately sometimes.

do. cry if you need to.
-college is a transition, and transitions can be hard. it's okay to feel overwhelmed by all that is new, and sometimes ya just gotta cry

don't. trust boys (or girls) too freely.
-not everyone you meet is going to be a good person. you don't know the people you're meeting and sometimes you can't gauge their true colors right away. proceed with caution, and don't throw your heart around too recklessly.

do. keep in touch with people from back home.
-even though you're at a brand new place with brand new people, chances are you will probably go back home. with college, you get the choice to keep in touch with people you want to and say a big ol' FU to those who made life icky.

don't. be afraid to do things alone.
-i don't know how to tell you this, but at the end of the day, you're all alone. being comfortable with being alone is a huge accomplishment. you don't have to rely on anyone to go to breakfast...go alone. because what's more embarrassing...eating alone or being afraid to do so?

do. realize that the "freshmen 15" is a very real thing.
-in high school, you were probably involved in at least one thing. and that one thing was better than nothing. you had pe. but in college, you have an all you can eat buffet at every meal, the option to go to the gym if you do or don't want, lots of high caloric alcoholic drinks around...you're going to put on something. my jeans are a little snug/don't fit. make sure you watch what you eat, and go to the gym more often than I did. Also, don't fill your dorm room with loads of junk food.

don't. worry about being "popular."
-college is not a popularity contest...it might be to some people, but they have their priorities wrong. especially at a large university, maybe 300 people will know your name and about 30000 won't. so you're playing a losing game.

do. learn the bus routes.
-if you go to a large school, taking the bus is such a blessing. now, sometimes if it's nice, you should walk. but there will be 100 degree days and -30 degree days, and every single one of those days constitute taking the bus.

do. give everyone a fair chance.
-I know, there wasn't a don't between, but make sure you give everyone the benefit of the doubt. college is full of all different sorts of people, so don't judge a book by it's cover. but as said before, don't trust them until they have proven they deserve such.

don't. compare your college experience to anyone else's.
- everyone is going to have a different college experience, different goals, and if you are comparing your life to someone else's, how will yours be the best it can be?

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So, I guess that's my advice! I probably have more, but I don't want to bombard ya'll.
If you have any questions, feel free to contact me in any form!
Twitter: @alannajean2013
Instagram: lanlanbaby
Ask: ask.fm/alannahill
Email: ahill1325@gmail.com

Also, please please please, share with your friends, etc. Also give me ideas for future posts and I'll be sure to mention you.

Trust Them as Far as You Can Throw Them

This post won't be funny... actually...
It's actually funny how absolutely ridiculous my life can be sometimes.
You know the when life gives you lemons saying...well that damn lemon tree is growing in my backyard.

As a girl, I have come across my fair share of complete a-hole boys. But today, today takes the cake.

So the story goes...
I met this kid on Tinder (probably my first error in this equation)
We had been hanging out, everything was actually hunky darn dory.

But ya know, all good things come to an end. And today was that point.

He invited me over to his frat (I will keep the name disclosed...I have more class than that.)
-this also was where I went wrong. I knew frat boys were a bad idea. bad bad idea.

One of the first things he said to me was to shut up...yup. Picked me up, I said two words, and he told me to shut up. So that should have forecast how the rest of the night should go.

It was going okay..but he was acting so aloof. So I simply asked him what his problem was...and that's when it all blew up.
He proceeded to laugh in my face all the while telling me how much he didn't care about me, never would, never wanted to. How he was being an ass hole just to be an ass hole. Laughing in my face...I just don't know. I didn't ask to be invited over...he did that on his own free will. My mind has actually blocked off the things he said... I can't even remember.

I don't see why it couldn't just be "Hey, this isn't working out."
Not this giant thing it had to be. So, of course, I started crying. It hurt me to my very core. But then at the end, I was just yelling. And I didn't care who in that frat house heard me. And then, he told me to walk home in the pouring rain. Walk home, in the rain.

In the end, he did give me a ride. An awkward ride in rainy silence. I'm surprised he didn't start driving when my first foot was out the door. It may have actually been better to walk in the rain...quite possibly.

Now, I came back, laid on the bathroom floor, and cried. My mom told me I needed to get my emotion out. So I'm writing this.

I just thinks this stands as a warning to every single woman out there...don't talk to boys. Do not talk to a boy unless he kisses your feet, I don't know. I have no advice because clearly I don't know what I'm doing. Just don't do it.

The worst part of it all was...people told me he was gay. But I said no..no way. And I still don't think he is...he's just a really sick person. But I should have listened to those people anyways..

Where do I go from here? I don't know...back to Tinder, Match, maybe the local prison because I doubt the men there could be any worse than the men out here. I do take blame for it partially, I'm a hopeless romantic. And maybe that's my downfall. 

My mom told me to quit talking to athletes...this kid wasn't. Maybe I should join a convent. 

But I know I have to keep going, just like all you ladies out there. We deserve so much more. We can't let one or three or sixteen boys ruin our hearts. Their hearts must already be ruined...someone out there is sitting on the toilet probably, but he might just be the guy you fall in love with forever. You should never give up on Mr. Right, just because there are so many Mr. Wrongs.

And maybe the truth is, we are our own happiness. It's okay to go to dinner, the lake, shopping alone. In the end, you're the only person who will have to be with you every day for every second for the rest of your life. So the first step is accepting and loving ourselves. And that's my first step. Right now. And I want it to be yours too.

Love and Laughter, Alanna. 

The Downfall of Juan Pablo

This season, I became an avid watcher of the Bachelor. I know that people have been obsessed with this show for years, but this is the first time I have really become engulfed in it. The reason I really started having an obsession was the gorgeous male specimen that was the Bachelor: Juan Pablo Galavis. 

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B: 

So, we have established that he is very attractive. And that held my dying devotion for a while...but...that's about where his list of good qualities ends. 

Let's face it Juan Pablo is a douche. In the end, it's rumored he picks Nikki over Crazy Clare, but it's also rumored that he chooses no one and is now with some girl named Mayra..someone not on the Bachelor. Just showing that Juan Pablo did the show for the "fame"...which is ending up not to be fame that is going to his favor.

In the end of all this, Juan Pablo is known for being a homophobic man, a sleaze ball, and just honestly really dumb.

That's Juan's biggest downfall...he has no intelligence. None. He says nothing but "It's okay." I understand that English isn't his first language, but that is not an excuse to be dumber than a sack of potatoes. Girls need someone who intellectually challenges them a bit (boys, take note.) This guy...there's nothing. 

On all the dates, about the only thing that happens is making out. Go to dinner, make out. Play baseball, make out. Roll down a hill in a giant ball, make out in the ball. He didn't care if he got to know these girls. One of the only lines I can actually remember him saying is, "______ is a really good kisser." But he also wanted to set a good example for his daughter, ya know? So he couldn't make out with a girl...but then made out with every other girl. Think about how gross that is...if you're the last girl, you've swapped spit with every other girl that night too.

Juan uses SO MANY EXCUSES. English isn't his first language. He wants to set a good example for Camilla.  But as a father, the only example you are setting for your daughter is in order for a man to fall in love with you, you will have to go on a game show with thirty other women. That's what you deserve, princess. This show (no matter how addictive) is not an organic way to find love...it's completely artificial. As a father, you should prove to your daughter that she deserves all the attention in the world...not be split among a bunch of other thirsty girls.

He also places blame on everyone but himself. It was Clare's fault what happened in the ocean. If Andi had asked to stay (which clearly she would never have done), he just wouldn't have let her stay. He tries to play the victim in everything...take some responsibility. Aren't you supposed to be a man? But he's all about the "honesty"...

And let's be honest, people who go on this show have to be defective in their lives. Why would a man who looked like this be single if he was intelligent, deep, kind, etc? He wouldn't be. And if he wanted a relationship for that matter. It is very obvious to see he is not interested in a serious relationship. He would have tried to really get to know the girls more if that had been the case. I learned more about these girls by their bios and lines under their names than anything Juan Pablo uncovered.

While I am not "Team Andi" per say, (I don't really want her to be the next Bachelorette), she was completely right about everything she said about him. Some people say it was mean, but Juan Pablo has nothing we should feel sorry about. It really helped me see..."Wait, yeah, she's right...he hasn't said anything besides, 'It's okay.'" And to a man who talks about a date with another woman to you...that is not right in any sense of the word or idea. No...just no. Let's say you're kind of talking to this guy, and he tells you about how another girl stayed over, and they just had a grand old time. Ew...he clearly is lacking every brain cell a human may need. He even sent a girl home on her birthday...like he didn't even try to find out if it was her birthday. 

I think Juan Pablo just goes to show that looks are not everything...or anything. He has the looks of a god...but his personality is a joke. And it's good that TWO girls realized that and dumped him. Boys like this are just a waste of space in the world. Beautiful appearances and then hollowness inside.

Juan...if you had only kept going as strong on the inside as your physical facade seemed to show. 

#kbyeJuanPablo

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